Reflective practice: uncovering foundational values

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Deeply in love and full of excitement, Sandra, my wife, and I welcomed lovingly our son Nigel into our hearts and world on September 4, 1974. Perhaps this photo assists you, the reader, to share our joy.
How could we have foreseen that 19 months later Sandra would die of
cancer and 25 years later Nigel would die in a car crash? These ground shattering experiences shook the very foundations of my life. They brought a stark choice: to sink into chasms of grief or strive towards everyday life and perhaps new mountaintop experiences?
In 2020, while attending a conference entitled “SuperVision”, I resonated
with Katherine McKennet’s words:
Every time I witness a strong person,
I want to know:
What dark did you conquer in your story?
Mountains do not rise without earthquakes.1
Awakening to the grim, dark, unfamiliar world of grief in 1976, I did not
feel strong, but rather powerless. I needed to practice reflecting day by day,
sometimes hour by hour. It was the only way to inch through these dark lands,
towards everyday life.
Reflecting on my grief experience was a priority. I was catapulted into a
strange land that lacked colour, meaning, purpose, and love. Without reflecting
on where I was and who I was, it would have been impossible to journey back to
loving life. Have grief experiences caused earthquakes in your life? In this paper,
I invite you to reflect on your pivotal life experiences, as I share some of mine.
Original languageEnglish
Article number4
Pages (from-to)89-104
Number of pages16
JournalSt. Mark's Review: A journal of Christian thought and opinion
Publication statusPublished - Dec 2020


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